This 12x15in square has been both a friend and foe to me for years. Days have been MADE and hours of frustration have been lost over this little electronic gremlin. During my younger years (we're talkin' early 20s) (oh JEEZ I now have the opportunity to talk about different parts of my 20s...) I would let this number actually configure my day. Lower number? Good Lord, it was skips and celebration. Higher number? Off to the gym for 8 miles on the treadmill with saltines to follow.
My activities were literally altered by what appeared on this meager little screen. Digits of delight or despair. Symbols of surprise or sorrow.
As I became more knowledgeable on fitness, health, and wellness, I realized my viewpoint was skewed. See now I wouldn't let my eating habits or exercise regimen change based on a number...no, no I was HEALTHY and strong.
So, like the healthy weight lifting gal I was, just let my self-esteem, emotions and morale be affected.
Oh good.
As I began my involvement in Bikini competitions, I let that silver gremlin take my hand once again. For the most part, we went down a road that was pretty darn great. Being in prep mode for almost a year with breaks of a few weeks for an "off season" enabled me to maintain a number I was pleased with. When in prep, and that damn number was decreasing, I was psyched.
My last competition was in October 2012 and after the show, I made the decision to take a legitimate off season, one that would improve my life, my career, my health, and my longevity.
As someone once told me, the important stuff.
I quickly realized the gremlin and I would have to part ways for a while. Not that those silly digits were changing in drastic ways, but it was preventing me from the change in mentality my body and mind were so desperately craving.
In the corner he went and the dust ensued. What came out of the darkness however, was a new found appreciation for the elements of progress that actually...mark progress.
Energy. The curve of a deltoid. Shiny hair. A bangin' bottom. The sensation of a strong, toned body. Good cholesterol levels. Headaches decreasing. Interests blossoming to more than a perfect spray tan and acrylic nails. Craving vegetables. Clear skin. A promotion. Deeper squats. Tight waist. Good posture.
I could go on, and on, and
These are small, sometimes silly, more so sincere, things that were on the back burner when I was focused on a statistic.
I'd like to bear in mind that tracking weight can be extremely motivating for those on a long journey. It can be one instrumental marker in their quest for wellness. I would never want to take away the significance of those who have lost "x" amount of weight because it usually means their well-being improved in the process as well. And kudos to that.
What it may do for some healthy, fitness minded individuals however, is become a marker of false development and a deterrent for concrete improvement in overall wellness and legitimate success.
It is a digit, followed by a digit...and if you're a typical human adult, another digit.
Three numbers.
Three numbers that do not tell you who you are, your value, or how strong your mind, soul, and body really are. The moment this marker of progress becomes a gremlin is the moment you owe it to yourself to place him in the corner.
Take it out if and when you're ready, but always remember true progress is not measured by a numeric value, but by a life worth living...by passion, strength, laughter, and love.
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